The 3 Essentials of Flirting
How come that some guys always get the girl YOU want? What makes them so successful at flirting, leaving you behind in the dust? It’s not only about looking good (although I have to admit it helps!). Learn these 3 essential elements of flirting, and be the one who comes out on top!
ESSENTIAL #1: BE CONFIDENT
One of the most important things women are attracted to is confidence. A man that feels at ease and comfortable, is sexy to women. So how do you portray confidence?
- Personal hygiene. Have a hair cut that fits you. Take a shower before you go. Wash your hair. Brush your teeth. Use a little (a little!) cologne if you like.
-Wear comfortable clothes. If you wear clothes that fit you well, and you feel at ease in, it will show. So if you are not a ’suit-n-tie’ guy, and you wear one anyway, it will show that you are not really comfortable.
- Watch your body posture. Stand tall. Make sure your back is straight, and pull your shoulders back. This will broaden your chest, and make you look stronger.
- Make eye contact. When talking to other people (even if they are not your objects of desire) make sure you make eye contact. People who are not confident shy away from making eye contact. If this means you… practice in a safe environment (at school, the mall, on the street, etc) until you can maintain eye contact. But please, don’t stare!
- Have a territory. Confident people take up more space. They stand or sit wider, put personal belongings on the bar, really own the space they’re in. Be aware of this.
- But most importantly… be yourself! There’s no use attracting women that would only like a fake you. And it’s much harder to portray confidence when you’re acting. Unless you’re Johnny Depp of course.
ESSENTIAL #2: MAKE YOUR BODY SAY WHAT YOUR MOUTH SAYS
For successful flirting, your body language needs to be in line with what you are saying. In other words, if your body language does not effectively promote what you are saying to a lady, then successful flirting will not happen.
Consider the following: if a guy says he’s really interested in a girl, yet he he’s looking around the room to see if an even better looking girl is around… well, the loudest message that he speaks is through his body language.
Study the behaviors of people who are successful at flirting, and use the movements that fit what you want. With confidence, because rule #1 still applies!
ESSENTIAL #3: OPENING LINES… KEEP IT SIMPLE!
After you made eye contact (don’t look away quickly, but for goodness sake, don’t stare either!), it is the time to deliver your opening line to her.
If you have spent hours honing down your opening sentence… forget it. Smart and witty opening lines may have you think you sound smart and witty… at her end the BS meter will go waaaaay up!
Keep it simple!
It’s much better to just say who you are, and explain that you’d like to talk to her. So, a simple “Hi, I’m Sam.” (if your name is Sam of course), and “Is it ok if we talk?” can do wonders. No big subjects for now… leave discussing Nietzsche for another time.
Just try to learn more about her… what she does for a living, what she likes to do in her free time, if she’s there with friends, stuff like that.
Don’t forget: be yourself! Be honest. If you’re not a millionaire, don’t imply that you are. Women are especially sensitive lie detectors, and this will push them away.
While there’s much more to using body language when flirting, these are the 3 essential MUST DO things. Without it, you don’t stand a chance. For some men it may take a little time to truly hone it, but the time invested will be well worth it.
It might land you a stellar new girlfriend!