Women and Self Esteem: Venture Outside Your Comfort Zones and Overcome a Play It Safe Mindset
Have you ever watched someone get up on stage to talk or act or perform in some way and say to yourself: “I would love to do that, but there is no way it’s going to happen.” How about being invited to sign up to run a marathon? You love to run, but again you tell yourself “No way… I could never do that.”
You would rather play it safe and stay in your comfort zones. It’s taken you years to develop and create your comfort zones and now that you have them you rarely venture outside their boundaries. Life is predictable and safe inside.
Here’s the thing:
If you let your fear, doubt and uncertainty keep you playing it safe, you are leaving a lot of opportunities for adventure on the table.
Lets look at a number scale of 1 - 10. This is a tongue in cheek analogy, it is not meant to judge or offend, please take what you like and leave the rest.
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10
One to Three: Represents the mindset of a couch potato… the ultimate comfort zone… snuggled up in your blankie… staying safe and warm and inside. Nothing very challenging happens here. You watch the same programs on tv, eat the same foods, talk about the same topics with the same people, take the same routes when you travel… etc. The same, familiar patterns every day. Routine, routine, routine.
Three to Five: A bit more adventure. You might enjoy an spontaneous invitation to a show, or a dinner or something else safe. It is still quite comfortable and predictable here. This is where many of us stay. We establish patterns and routines and have small adventures within those boundaries.
Note: Not a lot of growth happens up to this point. You may be learning things, but as far as personal growth is concerned, this is not the level of consciousness that is going to inspire you to take a risk and take you to new levels.
Five to Seven and a Half: This… is the optimum growth zone. You are far enough outside your comfort zones to experience new possibilities and a bit of un-comfort and un-balance. This is where you grow and expand. This is where life is interesting.
Seven and an Half to Ten: This is the extreme zone. It’s hard to grow and learn and expand when your adrenalin is surging through your body and your survival instincts have kicked in. This is akin to jumping out of an airplane, or being expected to do a stand-up comedy routine if you are a shy person. It’s hard to expand your consciousness when you are terrified. This is a survival zone, not an optimum learning zone.
Epilogue:
If this is resonating with you and you find yourself nodding your head and agreeing that you have been playing it safe, take heart… this is one of the easiest circumstances to remedy.
Don’t be afraid to push back the walls of your comfort zones. Don’t be afraid to make mistakes.
Coaching challenge:
Start by examining what you truly have a passion for. If you’re going to get uncomfortable and expand, it might’s as well be over something you love.
Think of a way to have an adventure in your area of passion that seems a bit uncomfortable. Now, make some plans.
Get out there and start experiencing your one and only life! You can go back to the couch when you need rest.